"Marriage Savers": Changing How We Communicate

In the sailing community, we call them “marriage savers.”

They’re just wireless headsets. A bit clunky, definitely not waterproof. But these little things? They changed everything.

If you’ve ever anchored at night, climbed a mast, docked in strong winds, or sailed through thick fog, you know how stressful it gets, especially when you can’t see each other, and you have to work together anyway.

We used to raise our voices just to be heard, then get mad that the other one was shouting.

The yelling wasn't personal, it was practical. But yelling still creates tension, and tension breaks trust.

Then we got the headsets.

Suddenly, we could just talk. A calm “I see you.” A quick “you’re doing great.” A gentle “I’m here.”

They took away the yelling.

And when you take away the yelling, you make space for patience, grace, and collaboration. Hence the name, marriage savers.

And honestly, I see this everywhere now. Not just on the boat.

In my work with clients and teams, I notice how often communication fails under pressure. We assume, we guess, we project.

We stop checking in with each other because we’re so focused on our own stress.

And then we explode. Or go quiet. Or both.

When communication breaks down, we don’t just misunderstand each other, we stop feeling seen.

That’s when things fall apart.

Communication won’t fix everything, but it’s where everything starts.

Whether you’re working in a team or navigating a big life transition, I’ve learned that the smallest tools, like a clear voice at the right time, can change everything.

So, what’s your version of a “marriage saver”?